One thing we can count on in our lives: Change is inevitable.
A little over a year ago, something happened in my own life that made me take notice of that statement. I realized how quickly, even in a matter of seconds, that life can change or take a different direction. Sometimes, we get so comfortable in the life we are living, good or not so good, that we continue to keep doing the same things. Even if it's not working out well, we know it, we know what to do with it--like a comfortable, old sweater.
When I considered the title to this blog, the song by David Bowie, "Changes," kept coming to my mind, so I typed it in. After looking at it, I realized that the way David Bowie sings it has a ring of truth--it's the hesitant way of trying to get the word out, ch-ch-changes. It reminds me how much we fight change, barely able to get the word out of our mouths, so to speak.
Change is uncomfortable. What we have always done brings a sense of comfort, despite the fact that it may be a dysfunctional way of behaving. The old way is familiar and we know how to act, even if it causes us a lot of distress. We all do it at times--we continue to do the same things over and over again even though we know it is destructive and unhealthy, either emotionally, socially, or physically, depending on the behavior.
Life never remains the same. Once we accept that life is going to have bumps and turns and potholes, we can begin to let go of our "normal" way of handling life and move on to rolling with the obstacles and being more creative in the way we navigate through life stages. Think about life stages--the way we are in our teens, moving through a career, ups and downs with our partner, aging, illness--I could go on and on. We can not expect that the same way we handled our lives in one stage is still appropriate for any new stage we are embarking on now.
So, in the words of David Bowie: "Turn and face the strange." Change is scary and feels uncomfortable, but one thing to remember: you will get past this point, it is temporary. So go ahead, give change a try, but go easy on yourself. If you fall back into old behaviors, accept that it happened and then try again! Don’t let setbacks end all your efforts. It will be worth it in the end.
If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude. – Maya Angelou